Welcome to Hyderabad!

We've been in Hyderabad for over three weeks now. And what a crazy three weeks it has been! Our first ten days here we were stranded in the basement of another SCH home because our house wasn't ready. The girls were stir crazy by the time we moved in! But the day finally came and we moved into our beautiful new home!

Our house (called Joy Home) is a giant two story house. We live on the first floor. Another group of kids that SCH will soon be getting from the government will live on the second. The amount of space we have is crazy! It's triple the size of our apartment in Ongole.Our house has four bedrooms and 4 1/2 baths. The older girls share one bedroom while the younger ones share another. The rooms are HUGE! Jackie, Heidi, Angel, Chelsea, Jeanette, Esther, Naomi, and Rebekah share the largest room of the house. They have more room than they've ever had in their lives! We are so thankful that SCH picked this beautiful house for our girls! The smallest bedroom in the house has been transformed into a school room where our girls do their homework. They have a tutor who comes every afternoon and helps with homework as well as catching them up in school as most of them are behind a couple years.

The best part of living in Hyderabad is our new schools! Having access to better schools is the main reason we moved. There were no special education resources in Ongole and our girls were not getting the education they needed or deserved. By the time we moved, four of our girls had been kicked out because they "didn't have any ability to learn". Getting all twelve enrolled in various schools was a long and stressful process, but we are thrilled to now see all twelve thriving in their new schools!

Esther, Jackie, Angel, and Chelsea are enrolled at Bachpan Playschool. Bachpan is a top notch preschool with one of the best academic programs in Hyderabad. Chelsea and Angel are in playgroup, the beginning class. Jackie is in nursery, the second level. We are really hoping they will soon see how smart she is and bump her up to LKG with Esther! Esther's class, LKG (lower kindergarten) focuses on learning to read and write small words as well as many other things. The girls love Bachpan and can't wait to put their uniforms on every morning!


Heidi started at Kangaroo Kids Playschool last week. I am so excited to see her thrive in their integrated program. I really think that attending a different school than her sisters will help her to develop appropriate social skills and become more attentive in an academic environment. Heidi loves going to school! She's the first one to leave in the morning (which is hard as she's the slowest of our bunch), but she can't wait to walk out the door and get on her bus every day!

Paula, Naomi, and Rebekah are attending Sparsh Special Education School. We absolutely love Sparsh and have been thrilled with the resources they have access to there! In addition to their education they each receive half an hour of speech therapy, physiotherapy, and occupational therapy every day! They come home with daily reports detailing what they learned and how their therapies went. Naomi and Rebekah have been learning how to jump in physiotherapy and Paula gets leg exercises every day! They are all learning phonics and how to pronounce their ABCs correctly. In occupational therapy they are learning how to correctly hold pencils and are working on fine motor skills.

Phoebe, Victoria, Stephanie, and Jeanette were recently enrolled at Devnar School for the Blind. Devnar is normally a boarding school, but they were happy to let our girls attend during their school day! They are all learning to read and write Braille as well as learning regular academics. They started them out in 1st Class since they didn't learn how to read Braille in Ongole. On the girls' first day we discovered that Phoebe had been enrolled at Devnar several years ago before she came to SCH! She learned Braille then and has continued with it on and off during her years at SCH. She's a really smart girl, and we are hoping she picks it back up quickly and can be promoted to a higher class! Devnar has amazing resources and education for children who are blind. We're really excited about the opportunities the girls will have here!


With school enrollment, comes heavy school fees. Thankfully, four of our girls get to attend school for free!! Victoria, Phoebe, Jeanette, and Stephanie have zero school fees! All they need is $25 a month each for transportation. Victoria and Phoebe's are already covered! Steph and Jeanette still need sponsors. You can become a $25 per month sponsor for Jeanette here and for Stephanie here. Just donate under the School Sponsorship link.

The rest of the girls have some pretty hefty school fees. All of the girls fees cover their tuition, enrollment fees, books, uniforms, field trips/special events, and transportation. We are currently fundraising to cover everything for this semester (now-May). Heidi needs $645. Chelsea, Angel, Jackie, and Esther each need $525. Paula, Naomi, and Rebecca each need $490.

We need $4,215 as soon as possible. I know that's a huge number, but every little bit helps! Could you please donate even just a simple $10 so our girls can go to school? You can donate at www.tinyurl.com/schjoyhomeschoolfees.

Enjoy our Shake It Off music video as you consider donating towards our girls' education!

Nine Little Nuggets

I already posted little blurbs on Heidi, Jackie, and Rebekah. If you missed it, you can read about them here! As promised, I am giving updates on all 12. Abby and I are about to start a child sponsorship campaign, where we focus on one child a week, so here are updates on my other nine!

Here is our Naomi babe. She is as silly as she looks. I always pair "babe" with Naomi's real Telugu name. Every day when Naomi gets home from school, she races up the stairs to our apartment and grins ear to ear as Abby and I sing "Naomi babe!" Naomi loves wearing her pants hiked up as high as she can get them with her shirt tucked in. Naomi struggled a little when we moved the newest six girls in a few weeks ago. I think she was used to being one of the most able bodied and rambunctious girls in the home. Naomi is really quiet sometimes and I think she had a hard time finding her place with her loud, rambunctious, mischievous, new sisters. She quickly formed a really special bond with Abby which has really helped her transition. Naomi is doing much better now!

Victoria is one of our wild girls! She is one of the funniest girls I have ever met. Let me give you a taste of her humor. Victoria is almost completely blind. (She has a little less than 10% vision, and she is missing an eye.) She has a prosthetic eye which she has started to outgrow. Because it is a little too small, it is easy for her to take in and out of her head. Victoria's favorite way to greet new short term volunteers is by taking out her prosthetic eye, holding it in her hand, and sticking it in people's faces saying "Here my eye! You see? Hahahahahaha." We are working on learning that taking your eye out your head to creep people out isn't very appropriate or nice. :) Victoria is definitely a huge goof, but she's also really sweet. Every night before bed Abby and I pray with the girls. Out big girls (Victoria, Phoebe, Stephanie, and Paula) take turns praying each night. A couple days ago when Victoria had her turn she prayed for each girl in our home by name, her former foster sisters who live in different homes now, and a couple of her former foster sisters who have been adopted. My favorite was when she prayed for one of her sisters who has a loving family in America now. Victoria prayed "Jesus love V. She America going. She love you."

Stephanie was the one girl I worried about when Abby and I decided to move all our girls in together. Steph is so quiet and timid, and I was afraid that having eleven sisters in the house would cause Steph to retreat even more. I was also worried that the other eleven would kind of forget about her because she isn't as "fun" of a playmate as many of her sisters. I am so happy to let you know that isn't the case! Phoebe LOVES Stephanie and always tries her best to make sure she is included. I catch the two of them sitting on the couch talking in rapid Telugu all the time! Occasionally Steph will get a little overwhelmed by the loud noise and commotion, but she is always reassured when Abby or I grab her hand and sing her a song.

Phoebe is the best big sister on the planet. She loves helping out with our littles like Chelsea, Heidi, and Angel. She carries Chels everywhere (But we might have to cut back some as Chels is getting a little spoiled in the no walking department). Phoebe loves doing the other girls' hair and she is actually really good at it! Some mornings she helps Abby and I get the younger ones ready for school. Phoebe astounds me. She can solve 50 piece puzzles completely on her own despite being completely blind. She translates for Abby and I when we need help communicating with our ayahs. Phoebe even tries to teach me Telugu! Sometimes we really forget she's still an 11 year old girl. Her maturity level is the highest I have ever seen in a girl her age. Half the time I feel more like Phoebe's big sister rather than her foster mom. Then she'll go into an uncontrollable giggle fit as she laughs at her own joke and I remember that she's still a kid who needs to be loved and deserves a normal childhood. I really love Phoebe. I love sitting around with her when the other girls are asleep and talking about her life. I love listening to her pray and talk about her love for Jesus.

Jeanette is our other wild child. She is completely blind and has a prosthetic left eye. Abby and I think she is also either autistic or has a sensory processing disorder. We refer to her as "tactilely curious" as she touches absolutely everything within a five foot radius of her.  Jeanette can be a little overwhelming at first, but she is so wonderful once you get to know her. She is a really loving eight year old who just doesn't know how to express her needs. A few days ago, Abby and I gave Jeanette some alone time one afternoon. We honestly thought it would last twenty minutes tops before she was over it. Jeanette surprised us! She sat and played by herself for nearly two hours! Abby and I really believe that if Jeanette gets adopted, she will be a completely different kid. She just needs more one on one attention!

Esther makes me laugh on a daily basis. She is always so giggly and silly! Esther really loves having younger sisters. In her old home she was one of the youngest. She enjoys being a big sister to the littles and getting to sleep in one our "big girl" rooms! Esther loves sneaking into my our bedroom and climbing into bed to snuggle with me or Abby. She always asks me to put henna on her hands, as it is one of her current favorite things! Esther knows how to write all of her ABCs, and she is learning to read! She's a really bright little girl! Abby and I can't wait to see how far she comes as we continue to work with her!

Chelsea has recovered from her pneumonia! Our poor little baby was so sick for over a week. She laid in bed with me nearly the entire day for almost three days straight. Her fever even peeked to 104.2! :( But our little Chels is a fighter! After several hard days she started to get back to her old self! Now she is walking around wagging her finger and trying to tell her big sisters who's in charge. In other words, she is back to normal! :) When she had pneumonia she went back into diapers because she was too sick to make it to the bathroom. Unfortunately that means we're really struggling with potty training now. Chels pees her pants 75% of the time and pitches a huge fit whenever we put her on the toilet. But we're working on it!!!

Paula loves having six new sisters in the house! She is homeschooled by a private tutor right now and really excelling! A couple months ago Paula couldn't even recognize letters and numbers. She is now recognizing her name and several sight words as well as many letters and numbers!! Paula is doing better and better with her wheelchair each day. She no longer fights us to get out. She stays in her wheelchair all day without us prompting her too! She is wheeling herself and beginning to tell her sisters to stop when they try and do it for her. She continues to be the most joyous one in our house and bring light into every day.

Angel continues to be our little stinker! :) She is the head-honcho in mischief. We've had some problems with her stealing things and with her throwing toys over our balcony. She's spent a great deal of her day in time-out recently, but she really seems to be learning! She knows what she is and isn't allowed to do. Angel really does love her sisters. She encourages Chels and Heidi who both struggle with using the potty. She totally thinks she's one of the big girls and tries to run with them even when they want to do "big girl" things!

Abby and I are about to start a sponsorship challenge. I will be posting more about it tomorrow! We will be highlighting one girl a week. We will each post two different blogs about her and share pictures and videos everyday. Our goal is to have all twelve of our girls FULLY SPONSORED by Christmas!! If we meet that girl, we will get to move to Hyderabad 4-5 months before we were originally scheduled to. This is something Abby and I really want to see happen as there are special education schools and speech therapy resources in Hyderabad that are not available in Ongole. Several of our girls REALLy need access to these resources, so we want to be in Hyderabad ASAP!

I have another little announcement that I'll post about later this week as well! :) 

Cheaper By The Dozen

It's time for my big announcement! I am now a foster mom to 12 girls!

Many of you all have seen me post on Facebook about my friend Abby who is coming to SCH to foster. Abby and I have been praying for a couple months about bringing our girls together and co-fostering. We really felt like this was what God was leading us to, so we spoke with our director and she was all for it! 

We are living on the entire top floor of our building, Faith Home. We decided to call our home the "House of Joyful Noise" which is fitting for our spunky twelve. The top floor is set up in two apartments which I turned into one giant home this week! We have four bedrooms. Abby and I share a bedroom (with AIR CONDITIONING - Hallelujah for that!). We are in the back apartment with our littlest girls in the other bedroom - Heidi, Angel, Chelsea, Jackie, and Naomi. The older girls live in the two bedrooms in the front. Jeanette, Esther, and Rebekah share a room and Paula, Stephanie, Phoebe, and Victoria share the other. I set the back apartment up to be a living room and GIANT play room! (Pictures to come!) The front apartment contains our dining area and we are turning that living room into a school room where out older girls can work on homework every evening. 

I've been a single foster mom to 12 for a little over 24 hours now, and let me tell you. It is HARD. I absolutely cannot wait until Abby gets here this week! On Monday night I am riding an overnight bus to Hyderabad so I can pick Abby up at the airport early Wednesday morning. On Thursday night Abby and I will be traveling back to Ongole and begin this wonderful fostering adventure together! 

These are my six who I've been fostering the past two months. Paula, Angel, Stephanie, Naomi, Chelsea, and Heidi. I'm excited to introduce you to my six new beautiful foster daughters!! Meet Phoebe, Victoria, Jackie, Rebekah, Jeanette, and Esther. 

Phoebe is completely blind and the smartest girl I have ever met. This girl can solve entire 25 piece puzzles completely on her own! She speaks really good English and loves to sit around and talk with me. She is really pretty mature for her age, and is a wonderful big sister to all our little ones! Phoebe is Stephanie's best friend and I couldn't be happier that they are now living together. Today I caught the two of them sitting on the couch jabbering away is rapid Telugu, which is something I have never heard Steph do with anyone! I'm really excited to see how great this will be for both of them.

Victoria is mostly blind (she has about 10% of her vision), and she is one of the most energetic girls I have ever met. Her smile is one of my all time favorites! Victoria is spunky, goofy, and absolutely wild. She has really surprised me since moving in though. When I met Victoria last summer, she bounced off the walls and was completely out of control. Sometimes she's still like that, but then last night she sat down with Phoebe and I and had a really serious conversation. This girl is really starting to grow up and I am so proud of her!

Jackie is my spunky five year old with some hand and feet differences. She was born with a deformity causing each of her hands to only have one finger and causing each of her feet to have only one toe. Jackie amazes me with what she can do with those two little fingers! She has learned how to write, draw, eat, hold utensils, you name it! Jackie's English is actually really good and she loves to strike up conversations with volunteers. This little ball of spunk cracks me up, and she might love the TV more than anyone else I know! :)

Rebekah has Apert's Syndrome which makes her look a little different. It also causes an intellectual disability, but as you know that doesn't make her any different than anyone else! Rebekah is wonderful, energetic, and crazy. A recent volunteer described her by saying, "I just love her. She's just like me - a hot mess." Rebekah really is a little hot mess! She is all over the place, all the time. But she is oh so loving. Last night Rebekah was a little scared being in our new home. So I curled up next to her in bed and rubbed her back as she fell asleep in my arms. I'm really excited to see how much Rebekah will grow in the coming months as Abby and I begin to really invest in her!

Jeanette is completely blind and 110% our wild child! She has a beautiful prosthetic eye. Jeanette is completely fearless. This girl can't see a thing, but that doesn't stop her from running around full speed with her arms stretched out in front of her! Jeanette spends a big chuck of her time wrapped around my waist ready for an adventure! Jeanette is full of energy and spunk! I love her and can't wait to see her learn to use her guide cane and become more independent without crashing into things! 

Esther has a mild form of cerebral palsy and an intellectual disability. She is so full of joy, excitement, and life! Esther was by far the most excited about moving in with us (which is saying a lot because all the girls were ecstatic!) When I went to pick them up from their old apartment Esther was jumping up and down screaming "YAY YAY YAY YAY!!!!!!" She is for sure a cutie pie and brings so much joy and life into our home!

So there you have it! I am a mama to twelve of the most amazing girls on the planet and I love it! In a few days our family will be complete with Abby mama, and we will be a wonderful and happy family of 14! :) 

"This day is holy of our Lord. Do not grieve, for the joy of the Lord is your strength." Nehemiah 8:10

Seven Reasons Why You Shouldn't Use the Word "Retarded"

I have been an advocate for the Spread the Word to End the Word Campaign for years. In high school I led a rally with the help of my friend Jonathan encouraging students to end the use of the words "retard" and "retarded." In high school I had seventeen reasons why you shouldn't say the r-word. Those seventeen reasons were seventeen of my closest friends, all of whom are living with disabilities. Now I have seven more.

I am currently living in India at Sarah's Covenant Homes, an orphanage for children with physical and developmental disabilities. I am a foster mom to seven of the most amazing girls who have ever walked this earth. All of girls are orphans who have been abandoned due to their disabilities. In Hinduism, which is the religion most Indians living in our area practice, it is believed that if someone is born with a disability they are being punished for something in a former life. A lot of Indian culture is shaped by Hindu beliefs including this one. People with disabilities are automatically put into the lowest caste and they are referred to as "untouchables."

My girls have all faced a lot of hardships in their lives, but I believe that has only made them stronger. There is absolutely nothing about them that is "retarded" or "untouchable." They are amazing.

Reason #1: Stephanie

Stephanie is my thirteen year old. She is blind and has some developmental delays due to not being in school or cared for during the early years of her life. She has been completely dependent on others nearly her entire life. Due to her past, Stephanie fears almost everything and she is really cautious to talk to people she doesn't trust. People have written her off as unable to do anything for herself. But that is not the case. Stephanie amazes me each and every day. Last week I introduced her to her new guide cane. No one had ever taught her the concept of a guide cane before, so naturally I was expecting the learning process to take awhile. But it didn't. Stephanie learned to use her cane independently in under two hours. Since that day, she uses her guide cane nearly everywhere she goes. She is learning to navigate new terrains, and she is beginning to stand up for herself and tell her foster sisters no when they try to lead her out of habit. Stephanie is trying new things every day and I am so proud of her. She is one of the most joyful girls I have ever met. This girl has a smile that could light up the world. You can read more about Stephanie and her accomplishments here.

Reason # 2: Leah

Leah was found at a train station two months ago. She was brought to a nearby orphanage by the police and dropped off. Within a week this orphanage deemed her "mentally unsound" because she could not state her name or where she had come from. She was transferred to SCH and placed in my home. Leah only speaks Hindi and the language spoken in this part of India is Telugu. My guess is she either didn't understand the first orphanage's questions because they were spoken in a different language, or she was too scared to tell these random strangers information about herself. I think Leah also has a speech problem and I am taking her to a Hindi speaking speech therapist soon to confirm. She has several behavioral issues as well, but that doesn't make her any different than anyone else. Yesterday I went to the beach with Leah and she laughed, played, and splashed just as any other kid would. She is a fun loving ten year old who loves to laugh and play. Leah's favorite thing to do is use the Talking Tom app on my iPad. She talks to it in Hindi and giggles every time it speaks back to her in her language. Leah is spunky and a completely independent person. She loves helping me pick out the little ones' outfits and get them dressed. She is altogether a happy kid despite her recent trauma of abandonment.

Reason # 3: Chelsea 

Chelsea is my youngest at three years old. She was born with a cleft lip and palate, but has had them repaired since coming to SCH. She is a silly and spunky girl who recently started school for the very first time! Chelsea has a prominent scar on her stomach from the g-tube she used prior to her surgery. Her scar and surgically repaired lip still outwardly mark her as "different" to many who meet her. But she isn't different. Every day upon arriving home from school, Chelsea runs up the stairs to our apartment screaming "HIIIIIII!" and giggles as I engulf her in a bear hug. She loves sneaking into our bathroom and playing in the water when I'm not looking, and she hates bed time. Her favorite thing to play with is the girls' tent tunnel, and she loves when I sing to her. Chelsea is your average three year old girl and a whole bundle of cuteness. 

Reason # 4: Naomi

Naomi is around eight years old and has Down syndrome. She was found three years ago and brought to SCH. We don't know much about her past, but it is likely that she spent the first five to six years of her life on the streets being kept alive by beggars who used her for pity, or kept hidden in her house by her family who saw her as a disgrace. Whatever her past may be, it left scars. Naomi cowers in fear if she thinks she has done something wrong. My heart breaks each time as I hold her close and tell her I love her and that I am never going to hurt her. Naomi doesn't speak very much; she can only say a few words in Telugu and one or two in English. She loves looking at pictures of herself and screaming her name, making sure everyone in the room knows that she is beautiful. Naomi is a problem solver. She loves doing puzzles and has even figured out how to use the touch screen to solve some puzzles on my iPad! Her favorite things to do are color pictures and make crafts, which she is insanely good at! Naomi has been through more than I can imagine in her short life, but she is a smart girl who is working hard to be like everyone else.

Reason #5: Paula

Paula is twelve years old and has cerebral palsy. She received her very first wheelchair in February and she is still learning how to use it. She spent the first eleven and a half years of her life crawling everywhere she went. She had to depend on others to carry her long distances and due to her mobility issues, she rarely got to leave the orphanage to go on outings with the other girls. Yet Paula is filled with so much joy. She always has a smile on her face and will make you laugh at the first thing she says. Paula is so determined to learn how to use her wheelchair and become more independent. I love pushing her through our "neighborhood" and letting her interact with other kids besides the ones living at SCH. She's your average preteen who secretly loves her mother's kisses, but will pretend to be disgusted and embarrassed when she receives them.

Reason # 6: Angel

Angel is four years old. She originally came to SCH with an undiagnosed "spinal problem" because she couldn't walk and wouldn't put weight on one of her legs. It was later found that she had osseous tuberculosis. She finished her nine month treatment last fall and has been rambunctious and stubborn ever since. She is incredibly silly and loves to be the ring leader of mischief around our home. Angel loves run up and down our balcony every evening after dinner. She giggles at herself every time she purposefully calls me the wrong name and laughs even harder when she sees my reaction. 

Reason # 7: Heidi

Heidi is four years old and has Down syndrome. She is a giggly girl who loves to play with me. Her favorite toy is her baby doll. Every day she combs it's hair and tries to braid it just like hers. She loves the baby swing in our apartment; she will laugh and laugh as I push her back and forth. Then when it is time to get out she waves her hands frantically to tell me "no no no!" and shoots me a sassy look as her feet touch the floor. She has more attitude and personality than any four year old I've ever known. She likes to boss her sisters around by wagging her little finger at anything they do wrong. Heidi hates getting dirty. Indians eat with their hands and don't use utensils, but Heidi hates it. Sometimes she'll refuse to eat unless I get her a spoon so her hands stay clean. She is cuddly and loves to be held and loved on. Heidi is learning to talk and is already saying a few words clearly!

Not a single one of my girls is a "retard." In fact, they are quite the opposite. My seven girls are AMAZING. They have been through more in their short lives than most of us will ever have to endure. They live in a culture that rejects them, and they live as orphans. They have me as their foster mom right now, but they won't have me forever. My seven girls are not "untouchables" and they are not any different than you and I. 

I love my girls more than I have ever loved anyone, and I thank God for them every day. Next time you start to use the word "retarded" to mean dumb, slow, stupid, inferior or whatever else, I hope you think of my girls. That word insults me and them on a deep level. My girls have overcome more in their lives than you or I probably ever will and they deserve words of praise and respect. 

Stop using the words "retard(ed)" today and instead think about my girls and words that better describe them.

My girls are amazing, brave, outstanding, loving, giggly, silly, fun, lovely, unbelievable, beautiful, artistic, determined, joyful, expressive, mischievous, enthusiastic, kindhearted, clever, helpful, gifted, tender, delightful, eager, hilarious, proud, jolly, lively, able, cheerful, entertaining, adventurous, cuddly, important, inquisitive,  helpful, noisy, rambunctious, talented, smiley, sneaky, worthwhile, and lovable. But they are most certainly not retarded. 

Meet Stephanie

Stephanie is the oldest girl in my home, but she is also the most overlooked. If you were to walk into my apartment Leah would bombard you immediately while screaming some exciting Hindi phrase. After you got past her, my three little ones would be jumping towards your waist and reaching for your hand. Chelsea would scream "HI!!!" (It's the only English word my 3 year old knows, so naturally she uses it ALL THE TIME.) Heidi would give you a look so full of attitude that you would probably start to laugh, and Angel would drag you towards the kitchen to see if you can reach the cookies she's been trying to sneak all day. Then you would see Naomi who is a little timid at first, but now that she's seen the other girls interact with you, she has probably decided that you're ok. She'll come up and hold your hand and really be content doing anything as long as she can cuddle up next to you. Paula will dazzle you with her award winning smile and really capture your heart. She will just be so excited that you are there to see her and be by her side. Then once you make it past the other six, you'll see beautiful Stephanie sitting in a chair patiently awaiting for you to say hi.

Stephanie is estimated to be 13, although personally I think she might be around a year older. She is blind and probably due to her past before coming to SCH, she is extremely quiet and timid. She is a really smart girl who understands English really well and can speak quite a bit. You wouldn't know that unless you spent a lot of time around her though. She doesn't talk very much and it is extremely rare for her to speak unless she is spoken to. She is afraid to lead herself around most of the time. She will usually just stand and wait for someone to lead her, even if it is small distances within our apartment. Normally she won't engage herself in what others are doing and seems to be pretty content just sitting there in her own little world.

Stephanie is normally defined by everything I just said. Other foster moms, volunteers, staff members, and me before I became her foster mom usually describe her as a happy and quiet girl who probably has some self confidence issues due to whatever her past may be. But she is so much more.

Stephanie is a young teenage girl who loves to music. She loves when I sing to her (which is saying something because I am far from a pretty singer); she loves when I play music in the apartment; she loves to sing songs along with me. Her favorite song to sing in English is Jesus Loves Me which she always requests when I ask her what she would like to sing.

Stephanie is amazing. Lately as I have been trying to teach her new things, she has gone above and beyond and learned them in a matter of minutes. A couple weeks ago I worked with her on pushing the little ones in the baby swing that hangs in our living room. I started by standing behind her with my hands over hers working on pushing the swing forward and bracing for when it came back. After awhile I had her try it on her own and the first few times she didn't really get it. She would catch the swing and kind of walk back and forth with it. But we kept working and honestly I thought it would probably be something we would need to work on for several weeks before she fully grasped the concept and built up enough courage to let go and have a 4 year old in a swing flying at her that she couldn't see. But she surprised me.

This was after just 20 minutes of pushing the girls! She began pushing them on her own! And as you can tell, she is SO happy. This girl amazes me. She is becoming SUCH a different person than she was even just a month ago. She is really starting to come out of her shell and try new things. She is gaining so much self confidence each day, and I am so proud of her.

Yesterday I started working with her on using her guide cane. This was the very first time I had introduced her to it, so naturally I expected our lesson not to get much further than just learning how to hold it. Stephanie surprised me once again! We spent around two hours up on our roof practicing and by the end of our time she was walking all the way across the roof by herself!

We began by learning how to the hold the cane. I was doing hand over hand with her as she learned how the cane felt. Then we began walking slowly with the tip of the cane touching the ground. I showed her how if felt when the cane bumped into objects, then we learned how to go around them. Within the first hour Stephanie was walking by herself, but I was still beside her and giving her many verbal directions.

Then she began to surprise me! Paula was also on the roof in her wheelchair. She has a long way to go in building up strength to wheel herself around all day. Imagine living 12 years of your life without a wheelchair then having to learn to use it all at once! It's a completely new way of life. So I took a break with Steph and began working with Paula. I kind of expected Steph to just stand there until I came back to her, because well that's normally just what she does. Once again, she amazed me. She continued to walk around independently with her cane! I wasn't even prompting her. She was so excited to be able to explore on her own! The joy on her face was absolutely radiant as you can see in these photos! 

After I finished working with Paula, I came back to Steph and decided to try something new. I told her I was going to walk to the other end of the roof and start talking to her. I wanted her to follow the sound of my voice and find me on her own. I cried as she walked across the roof completely independently for the very first time. The smile on her face lit up the world and joy was overflowing from her. My girl did it. She did something that so many had deemed impossible for her. 

We worked for another hour as Steph walked to me independently again and again. She went around obstacles and walked to the sound of my voice with a smile on her face. I cannot express to you all how proud I am of her. Stephanie is the most amazing thirteen year old I have ever met. She has been through so much in her life that I cannot even imagine. She's grown up in a place that rejects her and sees her as worthless. She's spent the majority of her life just sitting around because no one ever saw the need to invest in her and help bring her life. She is overcoming all of that. I wish everyone who's ever written her off could see her now. I wish they could see the beautiful and amazing young woman she is becoming. 

Stephanie is AMAZING. I am so proud to be her mama. 

Finding Home

I'm here! I am finally at my Indian home. But it doesn't feel like home to me. I feel like a stranger to this whole thing. Being a mom, the culture, the heat with no a/c, the food, the people, everything. I want to be completely honest in this blog, so you all can be praying for me and my girls. I want you to know exactly how I am feeling.

And it is hard. I knew it was going to be hard, but I don't think anything could have fully prepared me for this. I was sick my whole first day in Ongole. I tried to spend time with my girls in spurts here and there but my body just couldn't handle it. It is HOT here. Today the temperature was 108 without adding the humidity. (Ongole is only a few miles from the beach, so it is really humid.) Indian food is really spicy and far different than what I am used to. My girls don't speak very much English, so communication is hard. I think most of them understand quite a bit, but they can't speak it back. My ayah who lives with us speaks zero English and yells Telugu at me a lot to which I am probably returning a blank stare.

Honestly, I have probably spent more of my alone time crying than anything else. But as I prayed today, God really spoke to me.

He never said this was going to be easy. Following Jesus isn't easy. Jesus didn't call me to live an easy life in America. He called me to hard things. He called me to India. He called me to work with special needs orphans. He called me to this life. He called me to this very moment. He called me to seek His face in India.

And so, here I am. Trying to find home. For every second I miss my home in America, I pray and ask God to reveal home for me here. For every second I wish I was living my usual easy life, God reminds me that He doesn't call us to easy things. Furthering the Kingdom isn't easy. Truly following Jesus isn't easy. For every tear I shed, God brings me immeasurably more joy.

I love my girls. I love them more than I have ever loved anything else on this earth. And I don't want to be anywhere else. Finding home in India is hard, and sometimes I feel like my heart is in two places. But God has me here and my heart longs to be one with His.

He loves my girls unconditionally and relentlessly and He needs someone here on earth to show them that. So Here I am. Lord send me.

I'll be posting more and more about my girls over the next few weeks, but here is an introduction! :)

Chelsea is my youngest and she's a cutie pie. I couldn't get her to smile in this picture, but her smile is radiant. Chelsea loves to run outside our apartment door and hide around the corner until I find her. Then she's all giggles as I shower her with love and kisses.

Angel wasn't too sure how she felt about me our first day, but I think she's decided she likes me now. :) She's a little stinker sometimes and likes to get into trouble. Then when she's in time out, she tries to win you over with that dazzling smile of hers. She really is a good leader to the other little ones though. Even when she is getting in to trouble, she makes sure none of her sisters miss out on the fun.

Heidi won't smile for pictures, but she is all smiles for me. Today she followed me around every second always giggling when I would bend down to talk to her. Heidi is quite the little trickster as well!

Paula is my 110% total preteen. Sometimes she doesn't want anything to do with the rest of us, but most of the time she is the best big sister there ever was! Paula can't walk, but that doesn't stop her from helping all her other sisters with their mobility challenges. She is constantly by Stephanie's side helping her with things she cannot see. 

Leah is for sure my firecracker. She is wild and feisty and marches to the beat of her own drum. She only speaks Hindi while the rest of my girls speak Telugu, so communication is sometimes a challenge. She is very bright though and has already learned many nonverbal cues to communicate. We're working on English skills as well. :)

Stephanie reminds me a lot of the verse from 1 Peter 3:4 that says "it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight." Steph definitely has a gentle and quiet spirit. Some of that is due to lack of self confidence and fear because of her past. But I also think some of it is just who she is. Steph always sits alone off to the side away from her sisters. But when I come to her she reaches for my hand and says "Sing a song sister". Her voice is so quiet that you sometimes have to strain to hear her, but when you listen to her sing it is beautiful.

Naomi is silly and mischievous. She has a really special bond with both Heidi and Leah and plays well with them both. She is really curious and will get into absolutely anything and everything. She is really lovable and loves hugs and kisses!

This is my family. We are each very different and come from our own unique places, but we are a family. As hard as life is in India, I thank God every second that he brought me here.

Relentlessly

I spent a long time today thinking about God’s love for us. As I prepare to go to India, I have to constantly remind myself that I am doing this to serve God and no one else, not even my girls. I love my girls SO much. Not a minute goes by that I am not thinking of them, praying for them, and wishing I was already back in India by their sides. I would sacrifice everything I have for them.

But I am not doing this for them. 

I am going to India to serve God. I am going to India because five years ago God called me to work in an orphanage for children with disabilities in a country where they are casted out from society. I am going to India because God introduced me to SCH two years ago and has had me pray for them every day since. I am going to India to be with my Father. He created me, pursued me, loved me, and died for me. And I have to give every ounce of myself back to Him. 

A year ago, I was in a relationship with someone I loved very much. Without realizing it I had put him far above where God was in my life. Our relationship didn’t end on the prettiest of roads, and when I realized it was over I was devastated. I was broken. This person who I had invested so much in left me and didn’t turn back. 

I remember crying out to God, “Why did you let this happen? Why did you let me love him so deeply if it was just going to end? Lord, I’ve already forgiven him for the things he’s done wrong. I would welcome him back with open arms. Please God, I love him no matter what.”

I’ve never heard God speak to me as plainly as he did that day. He said, “Carrie, do you not see that is EXACTLY how I love you, but infinitely times so? I have already forgiven you of everything. I love you when you run away. I pursue you when you put other things before me. I will never stop pursuing you, never stop loving you. I am yours and you are mine. I love you no matter what.”

In that moment I finally began to realize how deeply God loves me. It took me falling in love and losing that person, being in what felt like unbearable pain from being rejected by the one whom I loved, to understand that God loves me just like that except deeper. Deeper than my mind can even begin to fathom. He loves me unconditionally. Relentlessly. His love for me never ends and it never fails. He loves me no matter what.

I just opened my Bible and a folded piece of paper fell out. It was a picture Heidi drew last summer. It’s actually just a bunch of scribbles made with a blue crayon. The paper is torn about a fourth of the way down and it looks like it is falling apart. Anyone else would look at it and think it’s trash, but to me it is one of the most special things I own. I have a little part of Heidi here with me. 

Heidi’s picture fell into my lap and I began to cry. I’m coming for you baby. I’ll be in Ongole so soon. When Marla Mummy leaves you won’t be alone. I’m coming for you and I will love you, care for you, and pray for you more and more as each day passes. I will never stop loving you. Never stop pursuing you. I will never stop giving you everything I am.

I couldn’t love Heidi like this if I didn’t know of my Father’s love for me. He loves me. He’s coming for me. He will never stop loving me or pursuing me. He will never stop giving me everything He has. I am His and He is mine. 

I serve a Father who loves Heidi. I serve a Father who loves Angel. I serve a Father who loves Chelsea, Paula, Stephanie, and Naomi. I serve a Father who loves me. 

He is bringing the seven of us together to become a family, and for that I could not be more thankful. He is bringing me to India to serve Him through loving my girls and becoming their mom. I am so in awe of a God who seeks out His children whether they be orphans in India or a lost, privileged girl in America. I am so thankful He pursues us and brings us into His Kingdom. 

“I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you. Before long, the world will not see me anymore, but you will see me. Because I live, you also will live. On that day you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you.” -John 14:18-20

Jesus promised not to leave us as orphans. He adopted me into his Kingdom. He adopted my girls into his Kingdom. He gave my girls a home. He gave my girls a foster mom. But most importantly, He gave my girls an everlasting Father.

I'm moving to India!

When I was a junior in high school God put a dream in my heart, a dream to one day work at an orphanage for children with disabilities in a developing country where they are oppressed from society. I didn’t know if a place like this even existed or if God was calling me to start my own orphanage one day. God had been calling me to mission work for years. He gave me a huge heart for people living in poverty as well as a huge heart for other cultures far different from my own.

Working with people who have disabilities brings me a joy that nothing else on this earth can. People have asked me why I started this work and what made me love it this much. I’ve thought about that a lot and I really believe God placed this passion in my heart when I was a really young child. When I was in kindergarten there were two students in my class who had disabilities. My mom could tell you multiple stories of me loving them and always being the first to volunteer to do more activities with them. Seeing as I was so young at the time, I don’t have too many vivid memories of when I was in kindergarten. But there is one memory I will never forget. I remember sitting in a circle of my classmates who were all talking to a girl in our class who was autistic. Many of the kids were asking her questions which prompted her to respond in a way that marked her as different and unintelligent. I remember all of the other kids laughing at her responses and imitating her speech behind her back. Little five year old Carrie got MAD. I remember not being able to stand hearing other kids make fun of her. So I began standing up for her. I have several memories of playing with this girl in our classroom and on the playground. When our kindergarten class took our first field trip to the zoo, we were told to find a partner whom we would stay with on the trip. I picked this girl over all my other friends because I wanted her to know that she had friends too. 

So why I am so passionate about working with people who have disabilities? I’ve just never seen these people as “different”. I’ve always seen them as equally as I see everyone else. I know the rest of the world doesn’t see them the same way I do, and my natural reaction is to stand up for them. 

Proverbs 31:8 says “Speak up for those who cannot speak for themselves, for the rights of all who are destitute.”

There are many people with disabilities who have trouble standing up for themselves due to communication barriers. That does not make them any less of a person. They know when they are being outcasted. They know when they are being made fun of. They know when others view them as childlike when they are fully grown teenagers and adults. And they hurt. Many of my friends who have disabilities long to be treated just like everyone else. And there is absolutely no reason they shouldn’t be. 

So that’s a little bit about why I feel called to work with people who have disabilities. I’ll post more about it in the coming weeks leading up to my trip to India! Which leads me to my big announcement and the whole reason I started this blog.

I AM MOVING TO INDIA! 

For six months I will be living in an apartment with six of the most beautiful girls on the planet. I will be their foster mama at Sarah’s Covenant Homes (the orphanage I volunteered at last summer and also known as SCH). I will be leaving sometime around June 18th (once my plane ticket is purchased I will know the exact date) and I will be returning to Tennessee in December.

To say I am absolutely thrilled would be an understatement. I cannot wait to see each of my six girls again and scope them up into my arms, showering them in hugs and kisses. I’d like to introduce them to you now so you can start to get to know them!

Stephanie is a quiet thirteen year old girl who loves music. She is blind and due to her disability and probably her history before arriving at SCH, she is very cautious to explore the world outside her personal space. One thing I’m incredibly excited about is purchasing her a guide cane! I’ll be ordering her one before I leave and taking it with me to India in June. I’ll spend time teaching her to explore the world on her own and hopefully build her confidence and help her to become more independent. I’ve been doing a lot of research on how to teach someone to use a guide cane, but I would really like to get in contact with someone who has experience here in the States first. So if you know of anyone I could learn from please let me know!

Paula is the most joy-filled twelve year old I have ever met. She has cerebral palsy and cannot walk but she recently received her very first wheelchair! She had to heavily depend on others for mobility her entire life, but she is now learning to get around on her own! Paula’s smile can literally light up a room and it’s nearly impossible not to be happy when you’re around her.

Naomi is about to turn nine. She was born with Down Syndrome and is a curious little girl ready to explore the world.

Angel will be turning four about a month before I arrive in India. She was brought to SCH with some undiagnosed problems which turned out to be tuberculosis. Thankfully she was under fantastic and loving care as she began a nine month treatment. And last fall it was announced that she is completely cured! She is an active and rambunctious little girl who loves to play.

Heidi is four years old and has Down Syndrome. As the world’s biggest cuddle bug, she really stole my heart last summer. For nearly three days she didn’t leave my arms as we sang songs, ate ice cream, finger painted, and ran around. God really bonded my heart to Heidi’s in a special way and I cannot wait to be back in India as her new mama!

Chelsea will be turning three in a few days! She was born with a cleft lip and palate but has had them repaired since arriving at SCH! When I met her last summer she was still learning to walk and spent a great deal of time cuddling in my lap. She is a sweet little girl who will be starting preschool soon!

All of my girls attend school in our city. The three little ones (Angel, Heidi, and Chelsea) are in preschool. 

I’m funding all of my personal expenses for my trip on my own so everything I fundraise will be for the girls! I’ll have another post soon detailing the items I am fundraising for and collecting!

I am incredibly excited about going back to India and fostering my girls! Join me in praying for them and preparing all of our hearts for my arrival. They currently have another amazing foster mom named Marla who is with them now. She will be leaving a few days after I arrive in June. Pray for her as well as she fosters these girls the next three months and prepares to move back to the States! 

“Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself from being polluted by the world.” -James 1:27